Finding the one

Nope it’s not always rosey and it definitely does not happen the way we expect it to happen. In my opinion, finding the one should never be about the hunt but it should start with some self-discovery, knowing you more than anyone else. Self-discovery and acceptance is very hard and a continuous journey. You don’t only find it if and when you’re single but it can also be found in your relationships with others.

Well my self-discovery journey began in my previous relationship; I honestly didn’t know I was going through a phase of self-discovery at the time. I was in a happy and loving relationship, tested a few times but came out on top most of those times. I learnt that not all relationships you get into are meant to last forever, no matter how great they are or how great your partner is.

Some people come into our lives to help us realise some truth about ourselves, when the job is done thorns grow on that beautiful flower, we start to try too hard to hold on but the thorns keep pricking us, yep it is time to let go. Problem is we never let go, we make silly excuses and try so very hard to make an uncomfortable situation comfortable for us. Not knowing that yes a relationship will go through problems which are meant to make you two grow as a couple but it should never be too hard to be in one, you should never feel drained 80% of the time or alone when you’re with someone. I would use that to sit back and look at the situation, dig deep within myself and ask all the hard questions.

Yes it will hurt like crazy, and if you do decide to let go it will take some time to rid yourself of the feelings you felt for that person. But at the end of the day you need to be happy and if the relationship is not fulfilling that purpose of making you happy you need to let it go. You might think that was it, but there is always better ahead.

NO, don’t go looking for it or forcing it onto others, focus on you and what makes you happy. The thing is, if you know yourself, if you know what brings you joy it makes it easier to spot right from wrong. You’ll know your worth and you won’t settle for mediocre. This thing is supposed to be effortless; it should not feel like you’re pushing a mountain, yes climbing a hill every now and then maybe.

The universe is always listening; it somehow conspires and brings things or people who are aligned to those things that bring you us. It is not always packaged the way you expect it to, most of the time it comes as a surprise a beautiful surprise. But you need to keep in mind that if it does not feel right or you feel like you’re bringing more to the table than your partner, your journey might not be at its final stages yet.

Well with all that said let’s forget about the destination and focus on the journey, we tend to ruin things with our expectations. Work with what you have and leave everything else to God, if it’s not right He’ll bring out the thorns trust me ;)